30 before 30 - Martha Screw-Up: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGGGGGGHHHHHHH.

OMG.

This poster will be the death of me.

Ok, 3 years ago, my husband bought me a really sweet, thoughtful anniversary gift: A poster with all of Shakespeare's sonnets on it. Romantic 'cuz they're all about love, and thoughtful because he figured I could use it in my future classroom. This was when I'd just finished my credential program and still had that thing, what's it called... oh, right, HOPE. *eye roll*

I decided that I'd hold onto it so I could frame it - didn't want it getting all bent up, even if I DID put it up in my classroom from the job I was sure to have and keep. (NO, I'm not bitter, what makes you say that? ;p) So I left it in its package, as it was in a plastic mailer around a poster mailer tube, so I figured it was safe, and I shoved it in our closet.

THIS WEEK I saw that Michaels was having a sale on frames, so I figured, FINALLY, perfect timing! I pulled the poster out earlier this week to get a look at it, remove the plastic wrapping... and the poster tube had been dented so hard that it had knocked one of the plastic ends INTO the tube.

WHAT. THE. F***.

Of course, because it was 3 years later, it's not like I can call the post office or poster company and get our money back. So I take the poster out to analyze the damage... and it's not torn, but it's really noticeably wrinkled and bent all along the left side. I show it to The Hubs, heartbroken, and he convinces me it's not THAT bad and to still get a frame for it.

Then I measure the poster this morning with a retractable tape measure this morning, and get distracted - it snaps back into the holder and tears a little hole RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE of the damn poster. I was able to do a little clear-packaging-tape surgery, but still. ARGH. First the wrinkling, now this?

It only gets worse.

So we go to Michaels, pick out a frame that has a thin black metal look. It says it's $30, but we have a coupon and a gift card, so we go for it. Turns out, it's actually only $10 so we figure, score! We ask the frame specialist dude how to hang it, he tells us to bend the little metal tooth-comb thing in the back out and put it on top of some nails.

I get home, I open the frame... and it's a cheap POS. The frame isn't together, it's 4 separate angled bars that you snap on and off the PLASTIC and corrugated cardboard frameback. *sigh* It takes me 30+ minutes to get it in between the two pieces, then get the nails up in the wall where I want it (which is just high enough that I can reach it on my tippy-toes, but I can't quite see if I'm pounding in the nails straight), then bend that stupid metal-tooth-comby-thing away from the frameback.

I pick up the frame, get it on the nails, and it's on but it's wobbly.

So I grab the side to see if I can straighten it, and it CRASHES DOWN AND TO THE LEFT. I let out a primal expletive scream and pick it up... to see that the upper left corner is now bent. The frame corners are bent, the cardboard frameback is bent, and the plastic has also cracked and broken off. It's noticeable.

At that point, The Hubs (who is already in an inexplicable MOOD that he doesn't really want to talk about) comes in to see what's up, and I'm sitting on the bed trying not to cry. He says I should take it back and get our money back, but I know they won't take it back; the wrapping's already removed and the metal thing's already bent. So I decide to make it work... but it just looks so crappy and I keep having to stop and whimper. No tears actually fall, just lots of deep sighs and whimpering noises.

I JUST WANT TO HANG THIS POSTER THAT HAS SWEET MEANING TO ME AND MAKE OUR HOME BEAUTIFUL BUT ON A G-D BUDGET. WHY IS THIS SO HARD.

So it's up, it's hung, and frankly, as long as you don't stare at it like it's the "Mona Lisa" in the Louvre, it's FINE. I'm just frustrated and dealing with a grumpy, upset husband and pissed that a cheap frame turned out to be a cheap frame.

So what did I learn from this adventure in idiocy?

1. Open your damn packages as soon as they damn arrive. *facepalm*
2. A cheap frame is exactly that: a cheap frame. I should've bought the bigger, heavier, more expensive one. 
3. The closer to the wall the frame is, the better, apparently. (I un-bent the metal hanging bit a little, and pushed the nails in a smidge closer to the wall, and it's sturdier now.)
4. No one is going to pay as much attention to the little details as you will. And when you're a perfectionist, that can be a really stressful thing to deal with. 

Trying not to make a big thing about this, but OMG it was the most frustrating ordeal. Now I hate this stupid poster. GRR.